I guess I should blog more than I do. There is something about being able to say what you want and people not reading it unless they choose to that is healing for me.
I have always wanted those I love to care about me enough to delve into my deepest pondering.
Sadly, often, my thoughts are too caverness...Deep, dark, lonely, overwhelming when not illuminated properly. It is a constant battle for me.
When I emerge from reflecting, and sometimes huddled in what seems like endless despair; the world is so bright and full of wonder. In the depths, the fairness of this world is called in to question and is a paralyzing prospect almost too vast to bare.
Right now I'm in between. I find the world to be such a foreign place. Soul connections in the form of true friends are so hard to find. I find myself wondering what makes most people tick...I would be utterly lost and hopeless without the love, grace and always listening of a faithful God!
Without his light, I would be lost! Fortunately he is able to illuminate even the shadowed places my mind can explore and make a beautiful work of my hidden mess. With him I am a beautiful mess.
I am a beautiful mess, worthy sometimes of a "Storm Warning..."Only some are brave and persistent enough to not only walk with me in the glittering brilliance of good times, but also to walk with me in the rain and witness the beauty of not only the lightning but of also the long awaited sunrises and sunsets.
So few can see that God is working out his own indescribable masterpiece in the depths of my heart and mind.
While I have been shaped by flood, storms, quakes, & drought his light has been forming a wondrous work in it all that few will ever care to explore. He creates and allows us to find beauty both in light and darkness and he is ever present in both as long as our hands are outstretched to grasp hold of Him.
His grace causes me to love because I know his works are not always gleaming like gold on the surface of this world and the people in it. He plants his goodness to be searched out, explored and cultivated with tender hands.
His work has nothing to do with my cares, but everything to do with my restoration and preservation, my growth and identity in Him. When he calls me home, I hope that the work He has done in me and those I seek out for him will call to account the prince of darkness.
Reinforcing forever that no corner of Gods working can be hidden. Gods's light will forever burst into glorious eternal gems and creations to beautiful to describe.
Splendid promise too unsearchable but fully within my reach.
God is greater...
Than my brokenness, emptiness, darkness, he brings fullness and colors even my darkest places with a song and brushstroke that reaches beyond his creation and resounds in the very halls and hills of Heaven. There he waits for me and promises that when I get home I will be fully perfected and will even reflect without inclusion the perfect light that only he brings.
To those who journey faithfully with me, I am deeply warmed, enveloped, appreciative and humbled because many are the acquaintances in this world, but few are the connections firmly cemented by a bond that even hell cannot destroy! Those understand what lie beyond and understand that we all have one friend in common who sticks closer than a brother!
Praise Jesus for your saving grace and a love so strong, assuring me that nothing can snatch me out of your hand!
Praise God for always lifting me up to walk with you in the cool of the day and warming me with your light!
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